Doing Life Together

The whole time I was reading My Name is Barbra, I pretended that Barbra Streisand was my dear friend and she was telling me all these stories about her life in person. That’s what her voice is like in this autobiography-like a dear friend who is trusting that she can open her heart and I will accept her, whether she’s talking about a great experience, a terrible regret, or a funny thing that happened.

Of course I know what her voice sounds like. She’s about ten years older than me, and I was a young teen when she took New York City by storm. My mother loved her music, and together we listened to her on the radio and watched her television appearances and specials. I remember the media coverage of Funny Girl. I saw The Way We Were in the movies with my then-fiancé, and Greg and I danced our first dance at our wedding to “The Way We Were,” even though people protested that was not an appropriate song for a first dance. (Since we celebrated our 52nd anniversary this year, from my current perspective it seems just right.) I’ve always loved Barbra Streisand, .

Yet, when her autobiography came out five months ago, I didn’t know if I wanted to read it.

But the clincher was when I read an excerpt. 

It took Streisand about 10 years to write this book, referring to her journals (Everyone should journal! If you aren’t already, start now! I wished I’d been more consistent about it, not that my life is anything as exciting as Streisand’s.) and calling on her assistants and past collaborators for details and corroboration. You’d think that somewhere in those 966 pages the pace would lag a little, but I can honestly say it did not. I was fully engaged, laughing and crying all the way through. My admiration for her has grown due to her commitment to excellence.

The book covers her entire life, starting with her early childhood. Her father died when she was 15 months old, and her mother was not skilled at showing affection to her daughter.

She always loved to sing, and she got her start performing as a singer, but her dream was to be an actress.

Whatever project she was working on, she had a vision for. Sometimes, especially in the beginning, her suggestions were not appreciated, and she met a lot of resistance. But she kept trying. For example, when she was recording her albums, she knew exactly how she wanted them to sound, how the instruments should be balanced, which songs should be included. She worked closely with the sound technicians, and ultimately learned how to get the effects she wanted. She would call songwriters and ask if she could change lyrics. Some of them embraced her ideas wholeheartedly and cooperated with her wishes.

On Broadway and also in the movies, she had ideas about how scenes should be staged, how sets should look, and how lines should be delivered. She often had to fight, and she didn’t always get her way. Eventually, her contracts had clauses that gave her artistic control over her productions. She grew to direct and produce many of her shows (and write them or parts of them) in addition to acting and/or singing in them.

And yet, being in charge wasn’t the point; making the best possible recording or show was. Streisand says:

When I finally became a director . . . when I got that power . . . I felt a deep calm. I no longer had to struggle to be heard. It wasn’t about making people listen to me . . . it was about listening to everyone else. And I discovered that the most powerful thing you can do with power is to share it. The giving of power enhances your own.

You can get a little inkling of her directing style from this video:

I learned a lot about Streisand that I didn’t know. For example, she loved vintage clothes, and especially in her younger years bought a lot of her clothes in thrift stores. She also designed many of her clothes, sometimes taking something she already owned and transforming it; or sometimes sewing something new from scratch. Many of the beautiful costumes she wore on stage or to awards ceremonies were made by famous designers from her own sketches.

My Name is Barbra is illustrated with gorgeous photographs of Streisand and all the important people in her life (and her album covers).

This is one of the best autobiographies I have ever read. If you like Barbra Streisand, you’ll love My Name Is Barbra.