3 Things American Christians Can Learn From My Mom… by Allison Boley
My mom made it easy for me to have a relationship with Jesus.
I figured I should start with the heart of the post instead of a cutesy story (I inserted a cutesy photograph to compensate), because I feel an urgency. Not because of ways the world is changing, but because of the ways many “Christian” responses to world events are disintegrating into fear-filled, knee-jerk battles.
I confess I often find myself angry with these increasingly ignorant responses, but in such moments I can choose to be part of the problem by acting in anger, or I can recognize that criticism does not drive out fear. Only perfect love drives out fear. The only human ever to exhibit perfect love is Jesus, so let’s make it easy for each other to experience perfect love by making it easy for each other to have relationships with Jesus.
Here’s how my mom did (still does) it.
1) My mom kept a singular focus on Jesus.
I tutored math, physics, and chemistry for several years, and once a student asked me if it was possible to believe in evolution and still be a Christian. He was convinced by the scientific evidence for evolution, and he was afraid that meant he was barred from being a Christian because his mom had told him the two were mutually exclusive.
This attitude of “to be a Christian you have to [fill in the blank]” is so pervasive in our culture that we have actually begun fighting for the blanks.
I’m grateful my mom never confused the blanks with the Way. “Jesus answered, ‘I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. If you really knew me, you would know my Father as well'” (John 14:6,7a NIV).
My mom encouraged me to know Jesus — to love His Word, to be open with Him in prayer. Certainly she encouraged me to obey Him as well, but she never pretended my actions were the way to the Father. Only Jesus.
2000 years ago, Jesus called out the experts in the law for “load[ing] people down with burdens they can hardly carry” (Luke 11:46b NIV). Let’s not follow their example, let’s follow my mom’s example.
Because my mom exhibited for me this singular focus on Jesus, I was able to answer my student: “Who do you think set up nature to function the way it does? You don’t have to be afraid of any scientific truth you find out. The only thing you have to do to be a Christian is accept Jesus.”
2) My mom never called down Jesus on her side.
I’ve heard of some parents invoking Jesus to get their kids to do their chores. I imagine it would be difficult to form a relationship with someone portrayed as a taskmaster of external, relatively unimportant activities. I say I imagine because I don’t know, because my mom never erected those barriers to a relationship with Jesus. I’m grateful.
While as a culture we may not be so blatantly (or even intentionally) selfish about it, I believe we need to be careful not to call down Jesus on our side in political or cultural issues. Instead, I believe we need to align ourselves with Jesus.
The difference may seem subtle, but I don’t think it is. When Joshua (one of my mom’s favorite biblical figures) was about to lead the Israelites to conquer the city of Jericho, an angel appeared to him. Joshua, not yet knowing it was an angel, asked whether he was for the Israelites or for their enemies. The angel’s answer? “Neither.” Actually, my Hebrew professor tells me this word is more accurately translated simply as “no” in what appears to be a rejection of the question altogether. My professor explains the angel’s answer as, “No! You’re asking the wrong question, dude. Try again.” Joshua’s response? To bow in reverence and ask, “What message does my Lord have for his servant?” (Joshua 5:14a,c NIV)
Instead of accepting evangelical culture’s agenda at face value and calling down God on our side, hitting others over the head with “Clean your room because Jesus wants you to,” let’s instead take a page from Joshua’s book, which is also a page from my mom’s book. Let’s humble ourselves and ask what God wants to say to us.
3) My mom modeled a loving relationship with Jesus.
This is easily the most important of the three, but it is also easily the most prone to misinterpretation. So let me be clear. My mom didn’t try to fake piety so I and my sisters would be good. Nor was the motivation for her relationship with Jesus so that we would have one too. Rather, my mom deeply and genuinely loves Jesus, and I saw it.
And because I saw what a healthy relationship with Jesus looked like, it was easier for me to have one too, when I decided that’s what I wanted.
I pray that as dearly loved people of Jesus, we can make it easier for other dearly loved people also to have a relationship with Him if they decide that’s what they want. I pray that our focus returns to Him alone, that we tear down the piddly barriers our culture has erected, and that we simply and genuinely let Him love us.
And thank you, Mom, for doing that for me.
Sweet Dreams . . . by Andrea R Huelsenbeck
I struggle to get off the ground, but finally I lift off and soar above my little town. I see my home below me, and I head toward school. Some of my friends look up and wave frantically. I know they are jealous, and I relish my superiority—until my lack of focus causes a rapid drop in altitude. I know what will happen next: I will hit the ground in humiliation, or I will wake myself up before I land in shame.
All my life I’ve been plagued by recurring dreams. Sometimes I know the moment I wake up that it wasn’t real. Other times I awaken devastated by horrific images in my brain, and for several minutes I mourn and try to plan what to do next, until finally reason kicks in, bringing relief.
One of my earliest recurring dreams from my childhood makes no sense at all. I am in the attic of my house. A martini glass fills itself with a Silly Putty-like semi-solid liquid. Then the substance overflows and fills the attic, trapping me under its weight. When it reaches a certain level, the glass rings like a bell, and I wake up. Why? Does it mean something? Why did I dream it over and over for years, until it became my most vivid childhood memory?
A dream from my adult life involves getting up early in the morning. I run in semi-darkness through my childhood hometown, several miles to the church and school I attended, and home again. It’s hard to begin running—my feet won’t move without great effort, but suddenly I lunge forward, light on my feet. I ran regularly in my early 30s, but only a daily mile. I tried running again in my 50s, but had to stop due to arthritis. I don’t know why I’ve been dreaming this the last few years, but for a while I believed it was actually happening, and I felt virtuous about running all those miles.
The worst recurring dream I ever had was before I resigned from my last job. I was on the freeway, and my car was going very fast—in reverse. The brake wouldn’t respond to my pressure on the pedal. I tried to turn the ignition off—but I couldn’t find the key, because I was watching the traffic over my shoulder, wrenching the steering wheel from side to side to evade the other cars I was hurtling toward. I woke up with my heart pounding, but it would take time for my panic to dissipate. Sometimes I could not get back to sleep.
Until I finally interpreted the dream.
My last few years teaching were incredibly stressful. Education is undergoing a paradigm shift. Concerns of teachers are ignored in favor of the accountability proposals of legislators. In Arizona, already with the lowest per-pupil funding in the nation, demands for better results coincided with further funding cuts. I vowed I wouldn’t use this blog to rant about lawmakers ruining education. Suffice it to say, I was trying so hard to do a good job at work, but it was never enough. Too many obstacles stood in my way–mandated changes in what I taught and how I taught, and a lack of supplies. My life was out of my control, and there was nothing I could do about it. When I recognized what my subconscious (or God) was trying to tell me, the terrifying speeding backward dreams stopped.
So, was my dream orchestrated my subconscious, that mysteriously perceptive functioning of the brain? Or was it truly a message from God?
The Bible is full of stories about God speaking to individuals in dreams. Joseph in the Old Testament had vivid dreams, and the gift of dream interpretation. Joseph in the New Testament also heard from God in dreams. When God describes the Day of the Lord, he says, “I will pour out my Spirit on all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy, your old men will dream dreams, your young men will see visions.” (See Joel 2:28 and Acts 2:17.) Clearly, dreams merit attention.
Not that all dreams come from God. I think that most, like the first three I mentioned, are just random images that the brain plays with while we’re sleeping. But certainly God can use dreams as an avenue of communication.
Have you ever had a disturbing dream? Have you ever had insight into one of your dreams? Have you ever felt that God was telling you something with a dream? Please share by commenting below.
Buying Early Can Be a Good Deal Unless…by Donna Clark Goodrich
Buying gifts early can be a good deal, but before you shell out that money or pull out that credit card, ask yourself the following questions. If the purchase passes all the tests, buy it, then pat yourself on the back for your forethought and thriftiness.
1. Will you have to charge the purchase?
If you have to charge it and you can’t pay the balance when the bill comes at the end of the month, it’s not a good deal. Being Scottish, I have a reluctance to transfer cash from my hand to someone else’s, but credit cards seem easier as I don’t see the cash actually leave my wallet. I heard of one wise shopper who uses a checkbook ledger to keep track of her credit card purchases, keeping an up-to-date balance. It has made her more aware of how much she is charging, and eliminates the end-of-the-month shock when the bill comes.
2. Will you end up spending more than you save?
When I bought my granddaughter a gift at the mall, I received a coupon for $10 off a future $50 purchase. On my next visit to that store, I looked endlessly for something else she would like (and that I could afford) to use that coupon, not wanting to waste it. Then I realized I would end up paying $40 for something she didn’t really want just to “save” the $10. I never did use the coupon.
3. Will you eventually buy another gift for this person?
It’s so easy to buy a gift early for a birthday or Christmas present and later end up buying something else for that person. Don’t do it! One mother had a habit of beginning her Christmas shopping during the back-to-school sales. However, the nearer Christmas came and the holiday ads flooded her mailbox, she would see “one more thing” that friend or relative would like, and every year she ended up going over her budget.
4. Will you be tempted to give it to the person before the actual date?
We have a standing joke in our family that about December 15th, one or both of my granddaughters will come to me and say, “Grandma, I’m so depressed,” hoping I will give them a gift early—and it often works! Or another family member will have a sick day or accomplish something really special and I’ll reach in the closet for one of the gifts I bought. Then I end up having to buy them another present for their birthday or Christmas.
5. Will the person’s size or taste change?
If it’s an item of clothing, the person’s size may change before the actual gift-giving time comes around. Or if it’s a toy related to a popular movie or TV series, the temporary fad may have run its course by the time the birthday or holiday rolls around. A young girl’s desire for Barbie™ items may soon change to New Direction; a boy’s from GI Joe to Star Trek to pirates or Ninja Turtles.
6. Do you have a place to store the item?
Trying to find a hiding place for a large item such as a weight set, or a 25-inch TV can be difficult. Your closet or storage shed can hold only so many bags and boxes so make sure you have a place for these gifts where they won’t be found. (Note: Make sure you remember where you hid them. One year when putting new clothes away, my daughter found a bag of gifts in her closet that she had bought at after-Christmas sales the year before.) Keep a list of what you have purchased and where you hid it. It also helps to keep this list from year to year so you don’t duplicate gifts.
7. Will you be able to return the item if you buy it early?
I bought my daughter a beautiful dolphin necklace one year in September through a mail order catalog. Not until she opened it at Christmas did we discover that the chain was defective. However, the company had a policy of no returns after 60 days. One discount chain in our town will not accept returns after 90 days, even with a receipt, and department stores at the mall are beginning to follow suit.
8. Will the quality deteriorate with time?
Perfume may evaporate, soaps and candles can melt, especially in warm climates. It’s tempting to buy items such as these in the January sales but will they be as appealing a year later?
9. Will the recipients buy the item themselves before the special occasion?
This has happened several times in our family. One year we bought a Christmas present on sale in October that we knew our daughter and husband really wanted. Unfortunately, they wanted one so desperately, they told us they were going to buy one. The one they were going to buy, however, was less expensive and an inferior version of the same product. This necessitated either taking our item back, or telling them we already bought a better one and giving it to them early—which we did in November because they needed it.
10. Is the warranty good only from the date you purchased the item?
If the warranty begins with the actual purchase date, you may lose several months on it, even though the item isn’t opened until a later date. This is especially important on bigger items such as computers and TVs. The merchant you bought the item from in September (or the company which offers the warranty) probably won’t buy your story that the gift wasn’t used until December 25.
* * *
Considering all the above hints, there are times it is a wise idea to buy things when they’re on sale. If you do this, be sure and keep them in a place you can easily locate them. Then you’ll always be ready for an unexpected birthday party, open house, baby shower, or a “just because” gift.
6 Reasons My Dad was the Best…by Linda Carlblom
Sunday is Father’s Day, so I thought a post about dads would be appropriate. Especially since I had the best dad on the planet. Was he perfect? Nope. And I bet yours wasn’t either. But really, isn’t that a relief? Because if they were perfect, it would make our own mistakes that much more glaring. So here are six things my dad did that made him the best. I could probably make a hundred more lists like this.
- He sacrificed for us. We didn’t necessarily know this at the time, but in hindsight, I can see many times when Dad worked when he’d rather have played; went without so we could have everything we needed; and played, when he might rather have slept.
- He laughed. This may not seem like a big deal, but do you know how much tension laughter can kill? Me either, but I know it’s a lot. And even though my dad was the tougher of my parents when we were young, he still laughed a lot and made us laugh, too. That’s a tremendous gift.
- He taught us stuff. Important stuff, like how to throw and catch a baseball; how to pray; to do a job right the first time; how to save money; and the importance of saying you’re sorry when you’ve hurt someone.
- He loved our mom. My mom and dad genuinely liked each other. They enjoyed being together. They got annoyed with each other. They worked as a team and showed us what a real relationship looked like, warts and all. It was an example I still look to in my own marriage.
- He didn’t always bend to us. My sister and I still talk about the time her doll’s dress flew out the car window when we were barreling down the freeway on vacation. She cried for him to go back to get it, but he refused. After all, you can’t just turn around on a major highway, but we didn’t understand that. We thought he was the meanest dad alive that day. But even then we learned things, like life doesn’t always go our way. Sometimes we can’t get things back, so hang on to things that mean a lot to you. Thanks, Dad. Lesson learned.
- He shared his faith. Dad’s love for God was palpable. He made no secret of it to us or anyone else. He showed us that the best way to share our faith is by loving other people. Step into their mess. Hug them. Listen. Dry tears. Offer a helping hand. Encourage them. He did this for so many people their stories still ring in my ears today. He did it for others and he did it for us. Unreservedly.
This August will be ten years since my dad died. But I can still hear his resonant, deep, bass voice singing. His laugh echos through our family gatherings. Most of all, I remember his big, tight hugs that said more than all his words combined.
Maybe your dad wasn’t so great or was absent from your life, and if so, I’m truly sorry. There is a Father who will never leave you or forsake you, who will stand up for you and defend you. He already loves you more than all the words in the Bible could ever say. Claim him as your very own Dad this Father’s Day. Why? Because you deserve the very best.
Linda
10 Tips for Taking Kids to the Ball Park…by Linda Carlblom
As a baseball fan, you’d love to take your kids to the ball park, but the thought of keeping your little ones in a confined space for three hours is daunting. Will they be bored? Whiney? Will it be a waste of money? Or worse, will you lose your patience and make them hate going to future games?
Your experience at the baseball game will undoubtedly be different with kids than without them. Expect to miss some plays and not be able to tune in to the game as much as usual. But it can be an awesome family time you all enjoy. Here are a few ideas to make your time at the ball park fun and memorable for all of you.
- Teach your kids patriotism. Stand, put your hand on your heart, look at the flag, and sing the National Anthem every game. And don’t forget to stand, stretch, and sing “Take Me Out to the Ball Game” or “God Bless America” during the seventh inning stretch.
- Let your kids take along a toy or two. Our youngest used to take her Fisher Price farm and play with it when she got bored, which brings me to my next point.
- Don’t worry about dirt. Kids are washable, so if they want to sit on the floor in front of their seat and use it as a table to eat or play, let them. That’s where our daughter used to play with her farm and it worked great. Just make sure whatever you put on the seat is heavy enough to hold the seat down so you’re not catapulting hot dogs to the row behind you which, by the way, the kids would want to do over and over.
- Listen for the organ music and clap along with the crowd. This keeps the kids involved and active. Whatever fun things are done at the park, participate. Clap, stomp, howl, wave, or do whatever the music calls for. We used to sometimes clap each other’s hands in high-five fashion just to switch it up a bit. And don’t forget to watch the Jumbotron (or whatever your park calls their huge scoreboard) for signals on what’s happening. Chase Field in Phoenix where the Arizona Diamondbacks play has a muscle cam where people show off their muscles; a kiss cam when the couple the camera lands on has to kiss; a mustard, ketchup, and relish race where you cheer for your favorite condiment, and lots of other fun stuff.
- If your child gets restless, visit the kid zone or playground found in most ball parks. This will give the kids something to look forward to if they’re not into the game. At the very least, take them for a fun walk around the park. And leave the game early if you need to. As your children get older, they’ll be able to last longer if you make this a fun excursion now, rather than a marathon.
- Teach the kids how the game is played and where to look for the score.
- Let kids make signs to hold up during the game.
- Get treats. It’s part of the fun of the ball park. Whether it’s a hot dog, ice cream, cotton candy, or treats you bring from home, make it a special outing and splurge a little.
- Encourage your kids to yell and cheer. Now’s the time for that outside voice!
- Don’t take the game too seriously. Your kids don’t need to see you angry at umpires or cussing out players who mess up. Set an example of good sportsmanship. Oh, and don’t forget to take pictures of the kids, the scoreboard, or whatever else you want to remember about your time at the ball park. If you arrive early, you may even get to snap a few pictures of players’ signing autographs for your kids!
Above all, have fun with your kids. Laugh. Enjoy the time you spend with them at the ball park because there may come a time they won’t want to go with you. Respect their choice. No pressure. No guilt. When they’re grown, chances are they’ll remember fondly the times you spent together and may even take their own kids one day. And if not, so be it. It’s just a game. The time you enjoy together is never wasted.
How about you? Have you taken your kids to sporting events? How did it go? What did you do to make it successful? Any mistakes you hope not to repeat? Let’s talk sports!
Linda
7 Benefits of Having Your Kids Sit In Church With You…by Linda Carlblom
I’m a proponent of having children, even very young ones, sit in church with you if they want to–and maybe even if they don’t!
I understand how hard it is. I know you don’t get much out of the sermon when you’re refereeing your kids in the pew. I get it. I really do. But that hour is important to their spiritual development. Don’t get me wrong. If your church offers children’s church or some other program for the kids during grown-up church, I think that can be beneficial, too. But so many churches don’t, and I don’t think kids are missing out by not having them.
So what are some benefits of having kids in church with you?
- They learn to sit quietly. This takes time and patience. It’s important that you bring along some quiet activities to help them with this.
- They feel connected to the church body. We are the body of Christ. That includes our children. They’re an important part of the body even now, not just in the future. Kids are never too young to feel that connection.
- They feel the Spirit. I know it seems they’re only squirming and counting the seconds until it’s over. But there’s a special, holy feeling in a church service that can’t be found anywhere else. Kids unconsciously pick up on this, even if it doesn’t seem like they get it.
- It builds faith memories. One Sunday after we sang the old hymn, Break Thou the Bread of Life, my pastor stood before us and admitted he had felt like a little boy again as he sang that song. He remembered it had often been sung as a communion song in his childhood church. He was mentally transported back to his boyhood and could see the faithful saints from his church passing the elements, even though he didn’t fully understand what it all meant at the time. My point? Had he not sat in church week after week, he wouldn’t have such sweet faith memories as an adult. These little things are what build faith.
- It shows children service opportunities. Children can see that there are people who hand out bulletins, pass the offering plate, sing on the worship team, play instruments, preach sermons, and participate in worship in various ways. One of those things may be something that interests them and they can envision themselves in that role one day.
- They learn to use their Bibles and sing praises. As the pastor uses scripture texts, they can try to find them with your help. Children should be encouraged to sing along with the songs. Have them sit and stand with the rest of the congregation. Teach them to participate in, not just tolerate, the service.You never know when something they hear will click and the Spirit will move them into a deeper place of faith. A verse or song they’ve heard may come to their minds in a difficult life situation and can be a source of strength for them.
- They see you worship.You’re your child’s most influential role model. You’re showing them how important it is to go to church. It’s absolutely vital they see you worship so they can follow your example as they grow into adults.
So don’t despair when you have your kids in church with you. All those wiggles and noises that sound magnified in your ears because it comes from your kids is part of their spiritual growth. They’re taking in way more than it seems. God is working miracles in the hidden places of their hearts.
What other benefits have you noticed by having your children in church with you? Do you they benefit more when they attend children’s church? Sound off in the comments below.
Linda
Tapes…by Carol Boley
I heard my grandfather’s voice for the first time in 30 years. It sounded just as I remembered it. My eyes misted and I smiled as I heard his gentle Southern drawl right in the middle of a story I knew well, and was afraid I would never hear again, about Charlie Bates, “a big ol’ bear of a man.”
I thought I had lost the cassette tape recording labelled “Granddaddy’s Memories, ” the one that told of his adventures growing up in southeast Arkansas when it was still wilderness. The one that stored tales of the Dermott hunting club, including the one with Mr. Charlie.
I had hidden my tape recorder in the hi-fi-cabinet during dinner in the hopes of capturing Granddaddy’s stories, but even more than that, the sound of his voice. Not sure how well it would work, I was surprised when I played the tape back later that evening that even amidst the clanking of forks and the occasional cough, there he was, laughing as he enjoyed telling the stories as much as we loved hearing them.
But that tape was recorded more than 30 years ago. Even if I found it, what kind of shape would it be in now? Perhaps those stories, that voice, were now only mine to remember. And if so, that would be enough. I had “played the tape” often in my mind, memorizing every word, every inflection.
So when I discovered the tape, hidden under other treasures, I couldn’t wait to dig out a cassette player and see…listen…if it still worked. Would it sound the same? Could I understand the words? Could I hear his voice?
My heart beat faster as I pressed the “play” button. I caught my breath as I waited. Then there it was, just as I remembered. Granddaddy’s voice. Mr. Charlie and the other hunters sitting around the campfire, unsuspecting, then throwing his arms up in the air and falling backwards as just a few yards away, a hollowed out tree stump exploded. The story went on. My grandfather had sneaked away from the campfire, filled the stump with dry leaves, doused it with gasoline, and then flicked matches into it until…Kaboom! Sparks and flaming twigs shot into the dark Arkansas night. He remembered doing it “just for fun.” Granddaddy laughed at the memory. Others at the dining room table remarked that he was lucky: a) the forest hadn’t caught fire; b) the other hunters hadn’t (at the very least) kicked him out of the club; or c) killed him.
What a joy to find that tape! Astonishing how completely I remembered the story word-for-word. Remarkable how the tone and inflection have stuck with me. How grateful I am for the memory and now for the tape. I’ve played it over and over.
But I have listened to other tapes and regretted it. I have memorized the tone, the meter, the inflection of words and stories that have wounded me. I have stored these tapes in my mind, kept them in a safe place where I can easily get to them. They do not wear out or rot over time. I recognize the stories. Some of the tapes are my in own voice. I have played them over and over.
These tapes rekindle flames of anger, shame, hurt, and bitterness. They spew burning missiles into my soul. They sap my joy. I don’t want to play those old tapes any more.
You know the ones. Your stories may be different but you recognize the voices and the words: “You’re not enough. You miss the mark. You blew it.”
I wish you would join me in not listening to those tapes any more. It’s okay to let them go. In fact, it is wise to let them go. There are better tapes for you to hear. Listen to the ones that tell you truth, not just someone else’s opinion. Listen to the ones that don’t label you for all time based on your past. Listen to the ones that offer you grace.
You know the ones. Your stories may be different but you know the voice and you know the words: “You are loved. You are forgiven. You are clean.”
Those are the tapes worth listening to, my friend. Those are the ones to memorize, every word and inflection, especially if they come in a gentle Southern drawl.
Heart Failure . . . by Andrea R Huelsenbeck
Source: hestia 0527 on http://www.craftsy.com
Years ago, my pastor’s wife started a sewing circle to make a quilt that, when auctioned off, would raise money for our financially struggling church. The emphasis was on stitching with excellence, but a special camaraderie formed around the quilting frame. People spoke freely, laughed with abandon. We grew into a tight-knit group. Once, a woman confessed it was her birthday, and she told her husband she wanted to celebrate her special day by coming to our quilting session.
We auctioned off the first quilt at our annual fall festival. A professional auctioneer donated his services, and the quilt netted several hundred dollars.
The sewing circle made plans for a whole-cloth quilt. Instead of a pieced or appliquéd design, the quilting stitches themselves would be the artistic focus of the quilt. The pastor’s wife carefully penciled the intricate design on the new quilt top, and we started our sessions again. But after a few weeks, our pastor received a call to teach in a seminary in Chad, his lifelong dream. The family made their plans for a quick departure.
Without a leader, the quilting group petered out. Exhausted from work, I stopped attending. In that transitional period between pastors, no one stepped up to take charge of the sewing circle.
A few weeks later, the church treasurer asked if I would take over leading the quilt group, since I had the most quilting experience of all the sewers. I said no, I didn’t want to be in charge, but I would help.
I stopped by the church one Thursday night ready to do some quilting, but the church was locked up and no one was there. I was surprised. I assumed the rest of the women were faithfully stitching away every week.
Because of being busy with other things, I didn’t give the quilt another thought until the next fall festival. To some attendees’ disappointment, there was no quilt to be auctioned.
Uh oh.
At the end of the day, I found the treasurer and admitted I’d dropped the ball. I’d made a feeble attempt to help, but not nearly enough to make a difference.
The church board ultimately decided to donate the partially completed quilt to a nearby Mennonite congregation. A few months later, they notified us that they had finished the quilt and sold it. They thanked us for passing it on to them.
This experience haunts me. I could have been more helpful, but I didn’t step up. The project fell apart because the beloved pastor’s wife was no longer there to guide us. I’d agreed to help, but I failed to deliver.
What could I have done differently?
Andrea’s Do-Over:
- I could have made an announcement to the congregation and found out exactly who was willing to continue on the project and when they were available.
- I could then have identified a common day and time when they could regularly work together.
- I and/or someone else could have taken a church key and been there to facilitate the volunteers.
Why didn’t I? I wanted someone else to handle it. But sometimes it just takes one person to get the ball rolling. I missed my chance to be that person because I didn’t make the effort. I couldn’t get my heart into it. Now my heart aches with regret.
This was not my first failure, and it won’t be my last. But it especially hurts because I let down people who are important to me. I hope I’ve learned from this. I now try not to commit to projects without first determining exactly how I can participate. Thinking things through can prevent heart failure.
Have you ever made a mistake that haunts you? What did you learn from your mistake?
Showing Teachers Appreciation…by Linda Carlblom
Author’s Note: This post first appeared on the Christian Children’s Authors blog. But since it’s still the end of the school year for many, I thought it appropriate to repost it for our readers here, too.
Here we are at the end of another school year. I have several friends who are teachers and when I recently asked them how they are, I got these responses. “I’m so stressed out.” I’m exhausted.” “I can’t wait for the school year to end.” These are good teachers who love their jobs and their students. But the demands placed on them at the end of the school year are heavy.
Teachers work hard every day. They have to be “on” for their students whether they feel inspired or not. They have lives outside of the classroom, yet their students often slip into their dreams and after school thoughts. Their work often takes over their evenings as they grade papers, attend special meetings, concerts, or make lesson plans.
How can you show appreciation to your child’s teacher in a way that’s meaningful? Gift cards are nice and handmade gifts are sweet, but really, they can only use so many of them.
One teacher told me that the mother of one of her students wrote her a letter expressing her thanks. “Linda, it was a full page, handwritten letter saying how her daughter had grown while in my class and that she was so thankful she’d been in our school.”
Her voice held a quality of disbelief. That simple gift struck a deep chord within her. It was personal. It validated her work. There was nothing cutesy about it. She certainly didn’t get a duplicate gift from another parent.
So this year, consider giving your child’s teacher a gift that expresses your genuine appreciation for all his or her hard work. Be specific. Here are a few questions to help you get started.
- What positive changes have you seen in your child this year?
- Did your child grasp a difficult subject better than ever due to this teacher?
- Did your child gain self confidence in this teacher’s classroom?
- Did he feel accepted or part of a team?
- Did your child gain a love of learning?
- Did this teacher partner with you to help your child?
- Was the teacher a good communicator of both positive and negative reports?
- Did he make learning fun?
- Did she spark new interests in your child?
- Did he show kindness, compassion, creativity, respect, to students?
There are so many ways to validate teachers. Hopefully, the questions above will help you pinpoint your child’s teacher’s strengths. Remember no teacher (or parent) is perfect. We’re all flawed. This isn’t about that. It’s a chance to build up and encourage the good things you see in another person.
And you can bet that next year, when that teacher faces a roomful of new children, she’ll remember the positive things you affirmed in her and repeat them with these students. You will have made a difference in her life, and that’s worth more than any gift card you could give.
How have you showed teachers appreciation? Share your ideas in the comments below.
Allison Boley
Carol Boley
dgood648
Joy
Andrea R Huelsenbeck
Betty Mason Arthurs
Linda Carlblom
Peggy Levesque
tuesdayschildren100
Judy Robertson
Doing Life Together 